shake it out, baby!

pulling into a gas station/convenience store in downtown vidalia, mississippi, i notice things are a bit in disarray. the place to insert my credit card was quite unusual, enclosed with duct tape on all four sides. dubiously, i inserted the card, only to be told to see the attendant.

after walking in, using the restroom (which hadn't been cleaned since 1984), i approached the attendant's counter.

"shake it out! shake it on out, in the name of jesus!", the attractive xxxl-sized woman was saying to someone on the phone. hanging up from her auntie, she gave me her full attention.

"what does that mean and did jesus say it?" i asked.

"it means shake out your illness. get the best of it," she replied.

"good advice," i said.

after completing our financial transaction, she leaned over the counter to give me the receipt.

"what is that down there?" i asked, glancing down at the bodice of her mu-mu. i could see some writing on her bosom and wanted to know what it said.

"it says 'pookie', with a rose right down the center of you-know-where," she answered.

"what does that mean?" i asked again, leaving jesus out of it this time.

"it means that's where pookie belongs and if pookie ain't there, i'm goin' after him," she said.

"i'll tell you one thing. i wouldn't want to be pookie if you were coming after me," i joked.

"you got that one right, honey."

"bye-bye, and shake it on out," i said, slipping out the door.

sometimes you get more than gas at the gas station.